- this blog is officially abandoned, because the owner chose to use a diary instead -

i'll use this blog as my private twitter from now on.. cs twitter is not that safe after all.

# i'm sitting on the same place, crying over about the same reason, but for a different person.

why do i always want to torture myself with tears and heart breaks. i have better choices and why i'm stuck with all these craps.. why am i that problematic.

as if i'm free all day long fuck ya.

things to think about

(random inspiring article came across me today)

....
Don't undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.



Don't set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.


Don't take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as they would your life, for without them, life is meaningless.


Don't let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future. By living your life one day at a time, you live ALL the days of your life.


Don't give up when you still have something to give. Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.


Don't be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect. It is this fragile thread that binds us to each together.


Don't be afraid to encounter risks. It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.


Don't shut love out of your life by saying it's impossible to find. The quickest way to receive love is to give it; the fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly; and the best way to keep love is to give it wings.



Don't run through life so fast that you forget not only where you've been, but also where you are going.



Don't forget, a person's greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated.


Don't be afraid to learn. Knowledge is weightless, a treasure you can always carry easily.


Don't use time or words carelessly. Neither can be retrieved.


Life is not a race, but a journey to be savored each step of the way.



Yesterday is history,

Tomorrow is a Mystery and

Today is a gift: that's why we call it The Present.

i turn extremely emo and down when i feel that i dont deserve to be loved. 


:'(

guess what. i actually googled for 'how to get over a crush'.. shall i consider that as my crush? i would think 'crush' sounds too.... minor -.- and i shall practice guideline 4: do not allow you to talk to your friends about him. this is kind of true as everything seemed to go way further after me telling my friends about him.

i tell myself, i must get over him and shall not let this bothers me for too long. 2 weeks of sem break should be more than enough for recovery. i shall stop crying and thinking for something unreachable.. stop all the hopes and dreams! cheer up wx. and! dont let history repeats itself, please :)

i pray that you'll be healthy, happy and successful always.

i've a small wish: find me at fb chat LOL. #this aint a hint or whatsoever la. after all, you wont be seeing this.

the sem has finally ended

18 days since 24/5. it's an important date which marked the highlight of the semester. i started to countdown since passed 18 days.. and the day had finally reached. so, yea.. i wont be seeing you anymore, like FOREVER.

*********************************
semester 2 aka winter/ 2012 had ended after 3 months. it's so short yet occupied. i feel extra reluctantly to end this semester probably due to some 1+4 people. like my housemate etc.. i truly appreciate time we had together throughout the months.. although i'm not like super close with most of the 1+4 people, i felt sad and cried during the farewell.. i feel regret for not knowing most of them more and for not creating more memories with them. anyway, i'll surely miss my housemates who are flying cs WE DID HAVE GOOD 9 MONTHS TOGETHER! and i'll surely remember our pre final outing <3

there's always one person you miss the most rightttt.. so yea, i have one too. i'm really glad to know you. although we're only getting closer in the last 2 weeks of the semester, i appreciate it. i wont be seeing you anymore i know. i cried for your leaving and not getting to know you more.. people say, dont cry because it has ended, smile because it happened. TRUE. but then again, we have not much memories and interactions after all. i would think you're the most awesomest friend i've ever met, in all aspects. i admire you, i respect you, i salute you. seriously.. :) i hope you'll remember me, and i hope we'll keep in touch. all the best, i wish you.

pre-final week

okay. it's been some time i never logged into blogger.. what's happening with its layout!

i'm having a pretty awesome life these days. i don't think i balance my life with social life, academics and sleep well.. you know the triangle thingy which says a college student can only choose two out of the three needs. so yea, guess what.. i'd sacrificed my rest time for having fun with friends and study for all the mid terms, tests, quizzes and then... FINAL, which is like one week from now. fml :'( i've real lots to do, but i've only 24 hours per day!!

anyway, this isn't the main concern these days. yea.. haha. something damn dramatic is happening in my life right now.


it's been a long time since i last crush on a guy this deep
i always wonder what do you think about me... and do you actually realize i've fallen for you. 


and yea.. i planned a study schedule for this whole pre-final week. HAHA. i hope i can follow it tightly this time! :) all the best in final, mates.

almost sem ends.

so yea.. it's been some time since my last blog update. i'm currently kind of busy with all college stuffs and final is somehow around the corner. anyway, the good thing is i do feel the motivation to study. i do enjoy staying back in campus studying in the library, studying in the study room of the hostel with coursemates. it's really a good thing to at least 'enjoy' studying.. sounded so nerd :/

but of course, i wont give up on good meals, shopping and socialization.. i would say i really enjoy being myself at this time and i hope all these good feelings will go on. despite all the stress, i feel the so-called college life like finally.

and i'd pre registered my subjects for next sem.. hopefully i'd made the right choice and i can get to know more people.. people whom i think i'll really enjoy being with. you know, i'm always eager to know new friends.. esp people who are talkative cs i'm one. LOL

tata.. it's 1.30am after a heavy dinner @seoul garden with coursemate. see.. this is life XD i define life as having all kinds of events like last minute.. spontaneously.

yes. i jealous.. yes. i think too much.. but so what? you never really care. i'll see how long till you actually realize it.

Solo Player - Jason

LYRICS:

From the moment you walked into my life, everything felt so right
From the moment I looked into your eyes I knew I had to make you mine
Girl you had me hooked on your love, but it was all a game to you
You drove a stake right through to my heart and left me bleeding for your love

(Chorus)

I tried everything to prove I loved you
Gave my, all to, make all of your dreams come true
But I'm no longer blinded by your lies
I know your heart was never mine
Why am I the Solo Player (In this game for two)
I'm the Solo Player (no our love was never true)
Oh I'm the solo player (in this game for two)
I cant be the solo player (baby love is a game for two)

Verse 2

A simple look at your smile and it makes me feel
Everything will be alrite
It's like I'm still in love with you, or maybe I'm just a fool
Girl you had me hooked on your love but it was all a game to you
Oh you drove a stake right through to my heart but I wont bleed for you no more

Bridge:
It doesnt matter how much I loved you, or how much I care
Even if you come crawling back girl, next time, I wont be there
I'm prepared to leave it all behind, oh no you were never mine
And even though it breaks my heart, girl I gotta let you go.

#so.. you can roughly guess what i'm thinking right? it's 1.06am

when blogging mood strikes

it's been weeks since my last update. erm.. today is a quite good beginning for what's happening next, i would say =.= guess what? i revealed my own secrets in front of my college mates today.. it's quite unbelievable that i've actually told so many people about my own 'history'. okay.. it ends up better than what i thought it would be. people out there are somehow more accepting than what you think they are.. idk it was what shown just to please me or let me feel better, but i do believe they are someone who going to be with me through all the ups and downs in these 2 years of college life. AT LEAST, when nostalgic strikes.. and all memories come in.. there're someone who really (i h
ope) understands and talk about it together with me. haha. i hope. after all, i can't depend everything on my high school besties who no longer be with me every single day. nahhh even my bff who is at the same college with me will be having different sem break.. like now, when i really can't depend on her everyday.

i'm feeling much much better than when i was writing my few previous posts.. so. yea. when i am not that emotional, i blog less. it's proven now :D anyway, i'm having real good time in college though it's mid term right now.. and you know you know.. i'm having LAB REPORT DUE TOMORROW 8AM, ECON TEST 10.20AM, BIOLOGY TEST WED, SOCIO TEST THURS. awesome right..

never mind, i'd this.. haha (ignore the 'morning') of course, my coffee wasn't as nice as the one in the pic la.. haha it's just mamak coffee. i hope it keeps me awake and i'll have a satisfying study night later.. for my economic test tmr :)

''you never experience this and you won't know it''

''i'm so happy for her.. she's gone through so much before this''

why people only realize those who got it after going through a lot but not those who are still waiting and going through all these?

a birthday post

it's been some time i din blog.. so erm. indeed, my mood changed better recently. not as moody as when i first started sem 2. anyway, i'm 19 already, can. you. believe. it! HAHA. :D i'm almost an adult.. almost. lol.

remember i mentioned something like i was afraid i would be alone on my 19th birthday since it's the 1st time not celebrating with family. but guess what! i had one of the most memorable birthday a few days ago in kl! i never know i would have so many people with me on my birthday this year..

on my birthday's eve, i went to ice skating at sunway with some sunway ipoh girls and some guys. it was my 1st time there! can you believe, staying in sunway almost a year and never stepped into the ice rink till that day? -.- i really had fun that night with all the laughter and screaming. thanks to those guys who like jokers playing fool around! HAHA. and we had buffet steamboat after that.

on my birthday, indescribable surprised and shocked by my bff's surprise plan. idk how to describe in words about the whole thing but.. seriously she made my day and she has done so much just for my birthday. i appreciate it lots <3 i got my dream birthday girft from her- TEDDY! <3 <3 <3 i feel i'm the luckiest girl on that day :) and dinner with sunway people at night. and and.. i got some presents from coursemates too! this is kind of unpredictable laa. haha..

and presents from xin ci pei ni hui nee are indeed memorable ones! i love you girls lots. my high school besties :) and and.. the epic one, video from matrikulasi selangor by my high school deskmate and xiao wen, my old friend since lower primary!

the moment your friends gave you presents you accidentally mentioned somewhere while shopping with them.. precious!

so yea.. it's a birthday post hehe.

thank you for everything, my best friend forever. <3

vday 2012

it's valentine! yea.. i wish the world happy valentine's ahha.. though i know it's kind of inappropriate for those who are single but be happy! vday is a day of love, can family love, siblings love and FRIENDS LOVE. <3 <3 <3

recently addicted to a chinese love song by olivia, 海枯石烂.. it's really nice!!
*tears dropping while listening to the song.. too many things struck my mind*

suddenly thought of something lame (just saying anyway),
i'm going for bed after 12am, i wanna wait and wait till the last second of vday 2012.. to wait for a miracle which won't happen.

#damn random

a long post of craps

i remember i mentioned things like blogging less means i'm more happier, it's not for now. i din blog for a week more i guess but this doesn't show i'm more happier nor less emo etc. i was sick past 2 days.. i even facebookng less so, yea.. anyway. i've nothing much to blog but to tell blogspot, i'm still as emo as before. i meant things never change into any better. maybe they do but i don't realize.. anyway, audrey definitely makes me feel better these day. having a best friend is more than enough. seriously. after all, i have more than one :D yea.. high school friends rocks.

i remember before coming back to kl xin ci texted me about take care stuff and one line i won't forget: 'dun emo and imba dy' HAHAH.. true! hopefully la. hahah.. erm. yea, kinda imba this day, same old problem.

and what audrey posted on my fb wall, 'don't depend too much on anyone in this world, because your shadow leaves you when you're in darkness' actually woke me up. this is the reality of life indeed! anyway, the touching part was the caption 'but you can depend on me (her)' you know. when you're about to cry and you see things like this from your bff, your tears will flow immediately not because of your problems but the best friendship with someone else.. and then you know, no matter how bad your life is right now, there's always someone.. besides your family. that's why. i never really think a bf for a girl is important maybe because i'm blessed with many good and genuine friends around, old friends esp :)

*****

my 19th birthday is coming real soon.. it'll be my first time in my life so far not getting to celebrate my birthday with family. it sounds a lil bit pathetic. :( and worse still my best friend and close ones are not with me.. seriously. i scared emo strikes me that day and i'll be having my 19th birthday in tears :'( i dont want! okay.. but i cannot expect everything in my life is just so perfect. never mind. as long as i don't care too much, i'll be less sensitive and small matters around me won't affect my mood. *hopefully*

p.s problems in my life are all caused by being too sensitive :/ i know my problems, not like i don't wanna get it over but.. but.. idk. maybe i haven't really gotten the sense of 'security' in life which shapes me this way. -.- sighhhhhhh strategy: keep myself busy all the time :D

daily promise: i'll be more and more happier over the time :) nwx today is always the happier one compares to the yesterday's. tomorrow will be better *wink*

actually right, i wonder my coursemates see a different (many differences) in me after i came back for sem 2. HAHAH. such a good ques before seeking for some comforts. -.- but i do realize people here are less-caring compare to those i have in high school. no offend anyway. *smiling all day long is no longer a symbol of happiness* and i think it's pretty obvious i'm less cheerful :/ and sorry for the long post. only emo people can produce a meaningless long post of craps like this.

best friend - jason chen

i wanna share a song by jason chen which i really love very much. not like i have the same experience like what the song referring to, but somehow part of the lyrics is what from my heart too.

Best Friend- Jason Chen. go listen wey! ahaha..
''Do you remember when I said I'd always be there.
Ever since we were ten, baby.
When we were out on the playground playing pretend.
Didn't know it back then.

Now I realize you were the only one
It's never too late to show it.
Grow old together,
Have feelings we had before
Back when we were so innocent

I pray for all your love
Girl our love is so unreal
I just wanna reach and touch you, squeeze you, somebody pinch me
This is something like a movie
And I dont know how it ends girl
but I fell in love with my Best Friend

Through all the dudes that came by
And all the nights that you'd cry.
I was there right by your side.
Do you remember when I said I'd always be there.
Ever since we were ten, baby.
When we were out on the playground playing pretend.
Didn't know it back then.

Now I realize you were the only one
It's never too late to show it.
Grow old together,
Have feelings we had before
Back when we were so innocent

I pray for all your love
Girl our love is so unreal
I just wanna reach and touch you, squeeze you, somebody pinch me
This is something like a movie
And I dont know how it ends girl
but I fell in love with my Best Friend

Through all the dudes that came by
And all the nights that you'd cry.
I was there right by your side.
How could I tell you I loved you
When you were so happy
With some other guy?

Now I realize you were the only one
It's never too late to show it.
Grow old together,
Have feelings we had before
When we were so innocent.

(Chorus)

I know it sounds crazy
That you'd be my baby.
But you mean that much to me.

'Cause nothing compares when
We're lighter than air and
We don't wanna come back down.

But I don't wanna ruin what we have
Love is so unpredictable.

But it's the risk that I'm taking,
Hoping, praying
You'd fall in love with your best friend

(Chorus) x2

I remember when I said I'd always be there
Ever since we were ten.
When we were out in the sandbox [playground] playing pretend.
Didn't know it back then...

Now I realize you were the only one
It's never too late to show it.
Grow old together,
Have feelings we had before
When we were so innocent.

(Chorus)

I know it sounds crazy
That you'd be my baby.
But you mean that much to me.

'Cause nothing compares when
We're lighter than air and
We don't wanna come back down.

But I don't wanna ruin what we have
Love is so unpredictable.

But it's the risk that I'm taking,
Hoping, praying
You'd fall in love with your best friend

(Chorus) x2

I remember when I said I'd always be there
Ever since we were ten.
When we were out in the sandbox [playground] playing pretend.
Didn't know it back then...''

chatted with friend tonight about some past history and yea.. girls' talk. emotions rushing over my body right now. yea, i'm thinking of all those craps again, those MEMORIES and FEELINGS.
i love the way we share stories and feelings, i love getting to know your stuffs and happy things. but then again.. idk what my mind wants it to be, to be happy for you or to feel sad? sad as in empty, disappointed etc. sometimes or most of the time i'm weeping while pretending to 'haha' when you're telling me your happy stories with the one you falling for. i never expect you to understand my feelings but i'm really glad you're willing to share your life with me. p/s in case you see this, do continue sharing your stories with me, i will be a good listener, and i do feel happy for you, sincerely.

it's like what in the lyrics,
''How could I tell you I love you
When you were so happy
With some other?''

retail therapy

i was being very moody, undeniably. i admit it.. but then again, why don't people just try to understand me more or at least ask what actually bugging me in my mind right now.. (maybe people din even realize i change since i was back for sem 2)

anyway, it's not a big matter or something very consequential.. it will not likely to give me a big impact on my life or something.. just some silly random thoughts making me moody. yea..

today received a call from my friend who asked me to go sunway hang out with her as she's quite free.. so of course i went. i need distraction to avoid thinking too much during free time. i went and had a good time. i bought a lot of stuffs.. not really but accessories, blouse and shorts. to me, it's already consider a lot as i seldom buy so many stuffs at a time.. so yea.. and i went to starbucks, zhia's kitchen, ochado and JCO for FOOD ONLY. wtf? yea. i enjoy spending money as if they come easily (i know they aint) but do forgive me.. cs i think retail therapy and spending money like this helps. my mood changed into a much better one already. i will thank my friend for this of course, without the call, i wont't be in sunway shopping.. and tonight probably another emo night again.. so tq ya.

i really feel being in a good mood changes all situations. everything seems to be so well going tonight after i recover from depressed state (hopefully it's a full recovery).. i remember friends used to tell me not to look things at 1 perspective and not to care too much. caring less, not to take things that serious makes me feel happier and lighter like now. i won't care what had happened. lets bygones be bygones.. and just be myself. again, it's my life. I WON'T CHANGE MYSELF JUST TO PLEASE PEOPLE.. esp friends. cs most of them are just acquaintances. they are not worth for me to change myself. who do you think you are? z. unless they are my bff. if not, i will stay who am i :)

I DECLARE I'M BACK INTO A HAPPY CHEERFUL GIRL :) after this retail therapy at sunway HAHAHAH

p/s i blog more when i'm emo/ moody. blogging less is a good sign. i wish i am happy everyday and leave this blog abandoned HAHA

a day of frustration

okay. it's the 2nd post of the day.. a day of frustration: -

- stupid laptop wireless card not powerful enough! online that time keeps lagging. i seriously can't stand connection like this!

- weather is too hot! i can't take it. the fan in my room is in the center and my 'section' is at the side. i can't feel the fan! i.hate.warm.weather

- random thoughts are annoying. they are prohibiting me from progressing.. as in a positive way.

#$%@

conclusion: i'm not in the right mood.. because of *erhem*

***

sometimes i feel i trust people very easily. i only know x for less than 3 months that time and i've told x almost my most deepest secrets. idk. i THOUGHT x will be a real best friend and i really feel telling her my problems will help. HMM.. i was kind of right at first, but definitely not now anymore. idk. silly thoughts like: 'what if one day x unfriend me and broke x's promise on keeping my secret?' 'what if x actually feel bad about what i told x but denied at first?' what if..if all these really happen, i shall slap myself and shout 'NEVER TRUST PEOPLE EASILY' at myself. i'm such a failure :/

gonna hit the sack soon. nights.

p/s i never invited people to my blog.. oh! i did. maybe just ONE of my friend.. the others who are viewing this probably get to know through others or stalking me? haha. anyway, my main point is I TREAT THIS AS MY DIARY OR SOMETHING, SO IF YOU ARE MENTIONED IN MY BLOG, DON'T GET OFFENDED. YOU CAN ALWAYS LEAVE THE PAGE AND.. IT'S MY WAY OF EXPRESSING. so.. yea :) tata.

i seriously hate people giving me the 'duh, sure not!' 'what else? of course laa..' 'told you so many times, i'm NOT' look and reaction. i don't mind these kinds of reaction if they stick with their so-fcking-sure-decision in the end. BUT THEY ARE NOT. they changed their decision in the end and said nothing about it. where's your 'duh, of course!' ?

f that b*tch

有时真的忍得很不好受。

sometimes i don't like posting stuff like this in blog post, cs it's only a sentence, just like a status. twitter or fb status are more appropriate. but i guess posting at here will be less noticed. yea.. not more than 5 people ever know i blog.. so.. yea. haha.. not even some of my close friends know, and the one who knew probably already thought i've abandoned it as i did abandon it for a year.. haha.

emo night,

nights.

a 4.54am post

so yea, it's 4.54AM! it was like my first time waking up at this time for no reason. i couldn't remember what time i went for bed yesterday night, probably around 10 and i already waken now. guess what actually woke me up?

i think i'd too used to sleeping on a twin sharing bed alone. coming back to a single bed in hostel after 6 weeks of hols seems so unfamiliar. I FELL DOWN FROM BED JUST NOW. yea.. i fell down, hit the table next to the bed and hurt my leg. fml. i was in a HIGH SCHOOL dreams with my high school friends surrounding me while this accident thingy happened. i was so into the dream until i din realize i'm actually sleeping in my hostel (not ipoh anymore). the reality comes in after i hurt my leg with the 'ouch' reaction. -.- yea FML right..

i post this as if it's my 1st time staying away from home and being alone outside or something like that.. but NO. i'm so used to hostel life since last march. so wth with me right. idk. i'm being very emo these days and really don't few like coming back to college life. i remember i said i never really like hols. but this hols changes everything. I DON'T WANNA COME BACK TO COLLEGE. maybe cs something bugging me right now.. that's why. i think i will back to loving schooling life again after something is solved.

cheers.

:)

out of boredom

it's 2nd day of cny.. nothing much beside meeting up with xiao wen, my close friend since std 3 :)

read aud's blog about her summary on sem 2 in fnbe, so guess what.. yeah! i wanna do a post on sem 1, fall 2011 in adp.. (it's gonna be a long and boring post ahead). it's a long sem, about 4 months. so glad it's over, but it's not a good sign cs something seemingly worse is coming..

in sem 1, i'd taken eng101 chem101 math161 acct201 and msian studies. haha.. all these subject codes somehow look like alien to people outside adp. anyway, i'd gone through all these safe and sound! lol. as a conclusion for sem 1, it wasn't that stressful like spm (seriously).. but definitely not easy esp eng101.. it's a course i never had confident on.. but i'm glad i'd completed it cs i think eng101 helps a lot. those themes for assignments like mall culture, lgbt, gender communication etc really served as eye openers to me. with one of the most awesome lecturer i've met, i think my eng has improved, at least erm.. 20% ? and undeniably, she made my probably only english course in taylor's a lil bit interesting.. without her, i guess i've hated english even more XD so.. yea. and also, not forget to mention my peers who edited my english assignments like wenjin and juan.. they really play roles in my final grade for english :) also because of eng101, i'm more closer to jin.. HAHAA. glad that i've her in adp :D

for math 161 right.. lmao. i remember the very first lesson i'd under this lecturer.. it was like a joke man! i couldn't understand a single thing he tried to deliver -.- i was so frustrated. i met real great math teachers since primary school, even till A level. but now.. HAHA. anyway, after a few lessons, i guess i started to cope a lil better esp with the quite useful textbook :) thanks God. lol.. anyway, the lecturer is friendly, dedicated and cute! but idk. his delivering skills need to be improved :X

chem 101 right!! my fav subj in the sem i guess.. firstly, i love chemistry since f4 so, it makes things easier la right.. haha. and the lecturer is like my high school phys teacher, ms wong. they are like 80% similar, they are real responsible ones. hehe.. nothing much beside my interest on chemistry increased. SIGH. i wish to majoring in chemistry... but not interested in the career. wth.

acct 201, HAHA. the lecturer's awesome laa.. hha. love everything in this course despite the heavy sem project which caused me to have a few 'sleepless' nights.

SEE, I'VE TOLD YOU IT'S A LONG POST! i really have nothing to do right now.. so let's continue.

FOR MORAL STUDIES RIGHT.. LMAO. speechless but enjoyed the community service to an orphanage.

in the coming sem, another 5 courses i'll be taking.. so.. yea! ALL THE BEST TO MYSELF AND MATES.

it's like really hard to make people accept you as who you are.. but i always believe that true friends accept your everything, they may not agree with you in many aspects but they accept that this is you. they'll be there for you throughout all the ups and downs in life. (not sure who am i referring to, just a plain thought that comes into my mind :D)

#HAPPY DRAGON YEAR 2012 world.

the pathetic moment when your heart is with someone but his/ hers is with someone else.

it's 1.26am. haha.. but no worries, aint an emo night.. but more on a night of reflections and nostalgia. while listening to some chinese songs playing in youtube, a sudden rush of emotions flooded me. without realizing, i was holding my own diary smiling.

while flipping through pages in my diary, i feel i'm growing up. time is ticking.. it's already 2012. people say lets bygones be bygones, but somehow i feel like going back to those unpleasant past events, because it was what which really made my high school life a lil bit different, and unique. i wouldn't say these memories are the real bad ones, cs i think i did enjoy myself. anyway, it's a real different story from most of my mates :)

every night at this moment, memories strike me and.. it will all end with a sweet slumber. nights world.

new year resolutions

wei xin's 2012 new year resolutions:

1. learn dancing

i really wish i can dance

2. eat less

keep my weight below 44kg (not THAT hard right)

3. spend less, save more

i'll prove to you i can do it

4. keep connected with high school friends

i love my high school friends. friends forever :))

5. learn cooking and baking

but i said i wanna eat less.. how?

6. get to know more international students :)

it's fun to know people from different backgrounds. *wink*

7. lead a HEALTHY lifestyle

healthy as in.. exercise more? (impossible) less sugary food (maybe) get enough sleep (SURE)

i'll let you know whether these resolutions make a success before 2013. :DD

it's 1.01am.. kind of emo tonight.

but like in my previousssss post, who cares right?? you are the reason but you will never know right.. i never show out tonight anyway. sometimes, i really wish showing out to you and telling you 'i'm fcking emo now (because of you)'.. but then again, you will only think the reasons are silly and you wouldn't care too, right?

2011

guess what, i was too bored and i went through all my posts throughout this few years.. i blogged too little in 2011. seriously.. i shall make a summary of the year :)

2011, a year which i have grown up a lot, a year which fulls of challenges and circumstances, a year with successful stories and failures, a year of opportunities, a year of hopes.. i guess.

i was truly blessed throughout the year, i managed to go through all the challenges with all the blessings and strengths.

so, i remember in the beginning of the year, i had my most bored 3 months after spm. i never really love holidays so, a 3 months with no schooling sucks actually. yea, it's carefree, but i really dont wanna go back to that 3 months when boredom stroke me everyday. anyway, i tried working.. not bad though. i learnt a lot through working seriously.. i heard stories from people of different backgrounds like aunties who are not educated and are salesgirls since very young age till the day of retirement, teenagers who dropped off from schools and started working after primary school etc. i felt i am so different from them, i respect them and i feel more grateful.

in march, 22nd i guess.. i entered sunway. it was one of the best memories of the year. i felt the so called college life, staying in on campus hostel was awesome.. hanging in sunway pyramid as often as possible with friends was great. i learnt a lot in A level with quite dedicated lecturers except for my __ lecturer who made me less interested in ___ HAHAH what else? YEA! memories with classmates!! i miss A1 and my friends there. i still remember my sunway id :DD i miss the place, realllllyyyyyyy. i remember the mini surprise farewell thingy for me and the last day i was in sunway uni college. AND. I LOVE MY HOSTEL THERE. (not like i dun like mine now.. but everyone will prefer that, trust me)

then i transferred to taylor's for adp. yea.. erm. basically the 1st month there was the deepest part of my life :/ lol.. you know, my 1st impression on SAT and TOEFL was so damn bad cs i screwed up in both.. now better i guess :| anyway, slowly.. i think i love adp. i never know i will like a course with 70% assignment based, but i do in the end. life in taylor's is awesome, only when i have a best and close friends here. duhhhh.. i met new friends here too. yea.. nothing really so memorable anyway.

i have really grown up in this year. i feel it -.-

by the way, friendship between me and my high school friends remains close even after we parted. :D

lesson learnt in the year: friendships need investment, stop investing when you dont feel right or happy (it's a self-defence from hurting)

*i created the history thingy back.. cs who knows, may be someone wants it lol.

从我爱上你的那一刻，我就知道你是我的一辈子。